#44: T.G.I. Friday’s–and other “bar and grills”

tgifridaysYo, f*ck T.G.I. Friday’s.

No, really…f*ck T.G.I. Friday’s.

I mean, as a restaurant, Friday’s is cool, you can slide off in there and get a proper meal that’ll stick to your ribs, feel good about life with the game or some random ESPN show on in the background.

The goddamn bars they have in them, however, are complete ghetto douchebag conventions.

And since ghetto people have a bad habit of f*cking off all the dedicated bars in town, leaving the security guards of said defunct establishments needing a post to work, you end up finding both varieties of meatheads converging on the local Friday’s. Somehow Friday’s shines as this supposed place to be.

This is especially the case in ghetto suburbs. Because these are places where the dedicated bars never existed to begin with, there’s a true obnoxiousness level one finds himself steeped in the minute they walk in. It’s hard for this author to wrap his head around. How in holy hell did Friday’s just become like the sh*t to ghetto people?

Really, it’s the douchiest place in the world. It’s lit like the developers of each location went nuts buying up the local f*ckin’ Lamps Plus. Other features of the decor make you think a barber pole just threw up on its walls and tables after having too many Friday’s drinks. Crowd consists of wannabe fat cat cigar smokers, the motorcycle club delegation (often Ruff Ryders), mutant looking females in the building to test drive the hair they just got done…for Friday’s of all places. How the hell does one try to get chose up in Friday’s? Whether it’s macking or bringing a date, you can’t hear a goddamn thing in there! And it gets stupid packed too. Ghetto people pack lots of patience for Friday’s because most people with half a brain and any dignity dig in their heels, spin 180 degrees and jump it off elsewhere.

It can easily be like this at the hood Chili’s, hood Applebee’s, hood Bennigan’s, what have you…but ALL T.G.I. Friday’s spots get this way after 4pm. This author is surprised they don’t just splurge for a DJ that likes to play Baha Men and Wang Chung, charge a dub admission, and introduce bottle service so ghetto people can really feel they’re doing it big.

Anyone reading this, please explain why the hell T.G.I. Friday’s is so f*ckin’ popular?

12 responses to “#44: T.G.I. Friday’s–and other “bar and grills”

  1. The don’t have real restaurants in Black neighborhoods, hood or not. Friday’s and Red Lobster are establishments that will put up shop close to home. Who wants to travel an hour to wait on food then travel an hour home?

    • Depends on where you live. There’s plenty of real restaurants in hoods and Black neighborhoods (yes, there’s a difference, people!) around here. Just depends on what you like and what kind of atmosphere you wanna take in.

      As far as dearth of options though, I do feel you…got a post coming up regarding that too.

  2. LOL!

    I went to a TGI Friday’s once. It seemed that everybody in that b*tch knew each other! Everybody who walked in the door had a group of folks yelling their name.

  3. do they even have TGI Friday’s in the hood? lol…anyway, I do remember Magic Johnson owning one

    http://www.yelp.com/biz/magic-johnsons-tgi-fridays-los-angeles

  4. I’m sorry that you feel that way about TGI Fridays. I’ve not encountered those kinds of conditions in the ones that I’ve been to; which have been very classy, if you ask me. Perhaps it depends on which town you live in, or which part of town it’s in. The reason it’s popular for me is because of it’s classiness, and the menu, and those yummy dessert-like frozen drinks.

  5. yeah, classy with a “K”

  6. Skippy, you better be packing some serious banjo if you are just plain Mayberry enought to visit the TGIF on Poplar in Memphis, TN. It may not be Girls Gone Wild stuff, but it IS Locals Gone Loco! Audi.

  7. My local T.G.I. Fridays does have a DJ on Saturdays. It really is like a club on the weekends.

  8. My local TGI Fridays actually decided to fight the “Culture” as we call it and bring in a Karoke machine. The local “culture” finds white people singing songs off key most offensive. Sad to say though is having moved to Northwest Indiana, I found out that the TGI Fridays and Wal-Mart are the hubs of all cultural activities ranging from “Culture” to “White Trash.”

  9. I can not stand our clientele. Its ghetto ass people and extreme couponers, both of whom do not tip for shit. We really no how to raise the standard at Fridays! … and I work at a respectable, middle class suburb

  10. Its a damn shame monkeys don’t know how to act in public.

  11. The one in Greenbelt, MD is ghetto-fabulous. Tatted bikers, live band, huge fat slobs and ghetto divas, loud as hell. Totally picked the wrong place to watch a ball game and have dinner. No more TgiFridays for me …ever.

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